Cheshta TaterCo-Founder, Rightantra Fauji Brat is a commonly used term in India (Military Brat in the United States) for children whose parent(s) serve in the armed forces (Army, Navy, Air Force, Coast Guard, Border Road Organisation, and Military Engineering Services, among others). Growing up, most of us have seen at least one film or a series which revolves around such a Military Brat. Whether it is Farah Khan’s Mai Hoon Na or Aubrey from Pitch Perfect or my latest and cringiest discovery, Ek Duje Ke Vaaste 2. Most of these carry traces, if not are wholly based on, of false stereotypes about the children from the Defence background. To point some of them out, we got in touch with some real-life Fauji Kids. Now that we know about several instances of misrepresentation and misconceptions perpetuated by popular media, it is time to reflect and understand why these perspectives about Defence kids are harmful.
It is most likely that you believe these misconceptions as reality if you haven’t conversed candidly with a person from the military background. Probable first interactions with a defence child are college, a coaching class, or the likes. At these stages, it is normal for every student to feel out of place as they are entering a fresh phase in their lives. However, this feeling of disarray is additional for children with a military background because questions as simple as “where are you from?” end up being a complex maze. Misconception-drowned peers only add to the identity crisis because everyone around has stereotypical opinions of your “strict parentage” and lust for “war and blood”. Having to justify every single move made by the national armed forces just adds onto the unnecessary burden the children have to carry, along with proving to the world that they have a personality and identity apart from their parent’s profession. While it is true that having a defence background is not a child’s complete identity, one has to acknowledge that it forms a major part of their identity and life. It is on par with a person’s religious or regional identity. So, insinuating or cracking “jokes” such as “You get everything for free or cheap, please get us ___” is not repetitive and offensive, but also ignorant of the fact that the “free stuff” is a part of the serving personnels’ salary- it is not free of cost. The last few years have witnessed a rapid rise in military-themed entertainment and discourse. Unfortunately, many of these have seriously offended the personnel as well as their families due to their inaccurate representation. Movies like ‘Gunjan Saxena: The Kargil Girl’ and shows like ‘Test Case’ try to push the narrative of sexism in the structure of the military, which is far from the truth. ‘Rustom’ and Ekta Kapoor’s ‘XXX’ try to convince the masses that infidelity of military wives is conventional. For a young child, or even a teenager, to consume such negative media about their community is extremely damaging, which could even lead to despising the culture they have been raised in. Moreover, as pointed out earlier, mainstream entertainment grossly lacks accurate representation of military children which means that a niche representation, for e.g.: a queer military child, is a distant dream. Just as we, as a society, are learning to grow sensitive to persons of various other minorities, it is also our responsibility to grow sensitive to children who are from a military background. Small gestures such as refraining from cracking same old jokes, or asking deeply personal questions, especially when it is explicitly or implicitly communicated that such behaviour is causing discomfort to the person, go a long way in ensuring the child feels accepted. Be kind :) Please note that the intention behind the author's expression of opinions is not to offend anyone and are largely based on personal and second-hand experiences.
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